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Will My Autistic Child Talk? What to Look For
- Autism-Talk
- Sep 19
- 6 min read
Table of Contents
TL;DR Summary
Speech is only one form of communication. Even before words, gestures, eye contact, and attempts to get attention are meaningful.
Watch for small hopeful signs like imitation, responding to name, pointing, sound-making or approximations. These are foundations for later speech.
Celebrate ANY communication, whether it’s spoken, gestured, signed, via picture exchange, or via assistive technology.
Introduce and encourage alternative communication tools (PECS, signs, AAC) early — they often support rather than hinder speech development.
Use free or low-cost services available via Early Intervention or Special Education Preschool (ages 3-5 under IDEA in the US), which often include speech therapy, OT, etc., regardless of private insurance.
For parents of autistic children, speech is one of the most anticipated developmental milestones. Hearing your child express what they think, feel, and believe opens a window into their inner world. But when speech is delayed—or there’s uncertainty whether it will ever happen—it can feel heartbreaking and overwhelming.
In my own family, all four of my children had significantly delayed speech. My two youngest had apraxia and at almost 4 years of age hand only a handful of words that others could understand. With consistent speech therapy and ABA (for one of the children), by age five they were fully communicative (though still hard to fully understand).
Now they’re doing great, average in all language areas except articulation. My two oldest children (teens now) spoke on time but have always been difficult to understand and still are, though they have long since given up speech therapy.
I learned that every child’s journey is different: timelines vary, challenges differ, but hope remains in many small, important signs.
Why Speech Looks Different in Autism
Speech delay in autism can come from many overlapping factors:
Motor planning difficulties (apraxia of speech)
Oral motor strength or coordination challenges
Receptive language (understanding) lagging behind expressive speech
Less motivation or less sense of social reward from speech early on
Sensory, cognitive, social, or attentional differences
Because of these, there is extreme variance. Some children begin speaking early with only minor delays; others remain minimally verbal for many years or even non-verbal their entire life.
Speech vs. Communication: Why Both Matter
Speech without communicative intent (for example, repeating what they hear without using it to interact) does not equal effective communication.
Non-speech forms—signs, gestures, picture systems, communication devices—can lead to greater connection and reduce frustration.
All communication attempts
should be seen as valid: pointing, pushing, eye contact, sounds, approximations.
Small Signs of Communication Growth
These are things to look for — often before true words arrive. Each is a small signal of growth that can be built upon:
Eye contact used to get attention or share something (rather than just random gaze)
Gestures (pointing, waving, showing, pushing away)
Responding when their name is called
Imitation of actions: clapping hands, banging blocks, copying gross motor moves such as jumping
Imitation of sounds: babbling, animal sounds, sound effects
Approximations of words (“buh” for bubble, “muh” for more)
Directing their communication toward a person (not just making sounds alone)
Attempts to “repair” communication: trying again if not understood
These early signs tell us the child is learning the purpose of communication, which is important because many young children with autism find this difficult.
Building Blocks That Lead to Speech
Speech usually builds on underlying skills. If these skills are weak, speech may be delayed.
Important building blocks:
Joint attention: sharing focus on the same thing with someone else
Imitation: of sounds, movements, facial expressions
Motivation to communicate: desire to request, protest, share
Understanding cause & effect: that making a sound or sign gets a response
Oral motor skills & planning: coordinating mouth, tongue, lips
Celebrating Every Form of Communication
Praise any attempt: sound, sign, gesture, picture, device
Recognize the child’s communication style—maybe sign or AAC works better early
Avoid pressure; encouragement works better than forcing attempts
Tools and Supports That Help
Some supports/tools that many families find helpful:
PECS (Picture Exchange Communication System) – helps children learn basics: gaining others’ attention, making a request, distinguishing wants. You can read more about PECS in my previous blog post here👇
Sign language – even simple signs like “more,” “eat,” “help” can help reduce frustration & build early communication.
AAC (Augmentative and Alternative Communication) devices – from low tech to high tech; provide a mode of communication if speech is delayed.
Speech therapy & occupational therapy (OT) – to address motor planning, oral structure, sensory issues.
Developmental Preschools & Free Services (US)
It’s really important that parents know: there are free or low-cost services in the U.S. for young children (usually ages 3-5) who qualify, through public education. These are not dependent on private insurance.
In the United States, under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), Part B, children aged 3-5 with developmental delays or diagnosed disabilities are eligible for special education preschool services. These often include speech therapy, OT, related services during the preschool day or as seperate services.
Before age 3, Early Intervention (Part C of IDEA) provides free (or low cost) supports for eligible infants/toddlers.
These services include evaluations, then an Individualized Education Program (IEP) or Individualized Family Service Plan (IFSP) to define what services the child needs: speech, language, social, motor, etc.
Every state/district has its rules, but generally there is a legal guarantee of special education preschool services (free for eligible children) that can include speech, OT, etc.
How Parents Can Support at Home
There are also practical, everyday ways to build on small signs and move toward speech:
Model language: narrate what you are doing, label objects, repeat simple words in context
Offer choices to invite response (e.g., “Do you want milk or water?”)
Use pauses: give time for your child to respond before jumping in
Imitate what your child does/says to build back-and-forth exchanges
Play to their interests: songs, sound games, animal sounds, silly faces
Use augmentative communication tools early, not waiting until speech is “late enough”
Celebrate every attempt: make it fun, build motivation
When to Seek Extra Help
You may want to reach out for more support if:
Your child shows few or none of the “small signs” (imitation, gesture, responding to name, etc.) after working with therapists or at home.
Speech or attempts are not increasing over time.
You suspect apraxia or another condition (speech motor planning) that requires specialized intervention.
You sense frustration or distress — kids try to communicate for a reason; if it’s not working, behavior often reflects the frustration.
Professionals to consider:
Speech-Language Pathologist (SLP)
Occupational Therapist (OT)
Developmental Pediatrician
Early intervention specialists and preschool special education staff
Relevant Research Findings
These evidence-based statistics and studies provide both helpful context and a sense of hope.
A study of 535 children with ASD who had few or no words by age 4 found that 70% had developed phrase speech or fluent speech by age 8; 47% were fluent speakers. sparkforautism.org+1
It’s estimated that about 30% of children with autism remain minimally verbal (that is, few or no spontaneous words) even after years of intervention. PMC+1
“Minimally verbal” or “nonverbal” children make up roughly 25-35% of the ASD population depending on definitions and measures. PubMed+2LEARN Behavioral+2
Research shows that many children who are nonverbal or minimally verbal understand much more language (receptive skills) than they express (expressive skills). For example, one study of ~1,600 children with low verbal skills found ~25% had much stronger receptive than expressive language. Autism Research Institute
These show both the challenges and the hopeful possibility: even if speech is delayed, many children eventually speak in phrases or fluently, especially with early intervention and supports.
Final Thoughts
Every autistic child’s communication path is unique. Some will speak, some will combine speech with signs or devices, some may use other tools. What matters most is connection: being understood, being able to express wants, needs, joys, frustrations.
As parents, your role includes:
noticing and nurturing small signs,
supporting underlying skills,
providing tools and communication options,
accessing free or low-cost services,
and celebrating progress however small it may seem.
Speech is a beautiful goal, but communication in any form is what builds relationships, understanding, and opens a child’s world.
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Rainbow Autism Resources on TPT – best for educators and therapists
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